Monday, February 3, 2014

Babies Are Hard On A Marriage

It's true.  Having a baby is hard, especially on your relationship.  You will fight more, but you will also love more.  Since Linus was born, my relationship with my husband has changed drastically.  Jon and I talked endlessly long before we were even married about how we would raise children.  We talked even more about it once we got pregnant.  No matter how much you talk about it, once the baby gets here, everything goes out the door.  You swore you'd put him directly into the crib to sleep, he ends up sleeping in a bassinet next to your bed.  You said you'd still get out and do fun things, you end up staying in for weeks.  Not to mention, you will be so sleep deprived the smallest thing will set you off!
Jon and I have argued more in the last 2 months than we have in the last 2 years.  We have a rule that we don't go to bed angry.  I know it's cliche, but it really seems to work.  It forces us to work out or disagreements so we don't hold onto them and get even angrier.  And that seems to make us even better as a couple.  We talk through more things, not just the baby.  So for us, having a baby has made us better at communicating.  Don't get me wrong, the past 2 months have been amazing and I couldn't love my son or husband more.  But if you're having a baby, take off those rose colored glasses!  Go into it knowing that you and your significant others relationship will never be the same.  Set a game plan with, but be open to changing it.  Most importantly, be realistic and communicate.  One day, you'll sleep again.

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